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A story of abandonment and connection with Susan McCulloch - SOUL PODCAST EPISODE #12

Name: Susan D. McCulloch

Age: 51

Occupation/Vocation: Energy Healer; The Emotion Code, Sound Healing, Vocal Healing, Consciousness Coaching, Meditation, Public Speaker.

Website: susanmcculloch.com

Hashtags/Social Media Handles: FB and Twitter @bodyreform

IG @susan_mcculloch_energy_healer

Favorite Quote:

“The cure for the pain is in the pain” Rumi

And

“Receiving is my Action”


What line in the Her Soul Story manifesto speaks to you the most? Why?

“We rise by lifting each other”. This is true on many levels. As we hold space for others, we each raise our emotional state in each other. Our energetic vibration raises as well. Everything is made of energy. Thoughts, emotions, the fields around our bodies, the cells inside our bodies, our organs and bones. SO as we help others, their vibrational frequency increases, and thus, the communal vibration automatically raises too. As the energy around each of us raises, the communal energy raises yet again. Around and inside of us, the energetic frequencies rise as we hold others up.

How do you define a soul story?

Soul stories are the stories that come from the very core of a person. It’s the story that is told with authenticity, and one that can be felt by others. Expressed in word, or sound, movement or visual art, and many other forms. A soul story moves others energetically. It’s a story that we can feel.

What is one of the best life lessons you have learned so far?

I’m still learning not to take myself too seriously!

What inspires you?

Other healers and children inspire me. An innocent child's laughter is similar in Energy to a healer performing their craft. Pure love shines through.

What motivates you?

Knowing there are people to connect with motivates me. I love the joy of welcoming someone with a smile and a hug. The excitement of new discoveries and of healing. When I am fortunate enough to connect in healing, whether its giving or receiving. My heart gets so filled with joy, I want to share this with everyone!

Do you have a daily practice that you do not miss?

My first waking moment of the day is the most important! I take that moment to observe breath, heart and the feeling of joy. Sometimes joy is easy to find. Sometimes, it is a challenge. I give myself the time I need to feel joy in my heart and then allow for joy to spread throughout my entire being. This is my morning meditation; the foundation of my day. I then perform a body scan, using my mind to explore my body from toes up to head. When I’m satisfied, I consciously put both feet on the floor and think to myself, both feet are grounded on the floor, I’m ready for this day, thank you Mother, Father, God.

Another thing I like to do is wake up my family members with Reiki. Drawing Master Reiki symbols in the air, then placing my hands on their back, between shoulder blades, sending Reiki prayers to their heart, asking the day to bring them the very best good. It’s just a loving way to connect with each of them before starting our busy lives. My older kids don’t allow for this really anymore, so I do it from across the room or house!

I also have daily movement of some kind or another. Cycling, swimming, yoga, Pilates are essential to supporting my life force. ( Also, dancing is super fun!)

If you could go back and give your younger self one piece of advice what would it be?

I would tell myself ( even myself today) to slow down, breathe and trust more. Life is about finding the joy in everything.

Who is the community you surround yourself with and why is that important to you?

I surround myself with people who laugh! People who like to have fun. There are also Energy Workers, Sound Healers, Spiritual Seekers and Consciousness Enthusiasts. Mostly a very joyful Wellness community.


Please share one of your Soul Stories with us. 

I really struggled with answering this. I used to say I could fill a year of Oprah shows with the experiences I’ve had! The story that I feel rising for this interview is about abandonment and connection. It is also the first story of my life. I was born in a Maternity Sanitarium. Maternity Sanitariums were expensive homes for young unwed mothers.These girls were kept inside and healthy, until their babies were born, and then sent back home to their families without their babies.

The babies were then advertised in the newspaper. “Come get your blonde haired, blue eyed little girl, we have several to choose from”. This was a line from actual ad in the Kansas City Times Newspaper. I spent the first month of life at The Willows Maternity Sanitarium without a home, or parents, or family to bond with.

I feel it’s mainly because of this first month I seek connection so deeply with others, with spirituality, with my body through movement, with art, with sound, with healing. I did eventually go home with a family. A seemingly perfect family. She was a nurse, he was a Policeman, a detective. They had adopted a little boy two years prior. There was deep pain here, though, pain that would reveal itself over and over again. But that is another story, for another day. This story is about me and my birth mother. I always knew growing up that I was adopted. My heart always felt like something was missing. Even after getting married and having children I wondered who she was.

Creating a family of my own with my husband, and having actual blood relatives filled me with a joy I had longed for, but I fantasized about her and where I came from. In 2011 I was checking an old email account. I came across an email that left me breathless.

It was from a woman who had seen a blog post I had written on The Willows Maternity Sanitarium website. She had been at The Willows during the time I was born there. Could we be a match? Related? Reunited? I was 43 at the time, and couldn’t believe what I was reading.

While I was breathless, and searching for ways in my mind to articulate to my husband what was happening, I also was thinking “wow, this feels much less dramatic than I had dreamt it would be,” but yet I was still breathless! The woman said she had sent an email a year earlier at the urging of her daughters. I

had missed that one, but wait, I have sisters too???? I was beyond overwhelmed, there was no precedent for what was happening, I didn’t know anyone who this had happened too. How was I to process what was happening?

My husband was a great support, and suggested we have a DNA test. In the meantime, the woman and I were writing back and forth. I noticed in her writing, she used excessive exclamation points and seemed to have a great sense humor and positive outlook, all characteristics I too possess. We swiped our cheeks separately for DNA samples and sent off our envelopes. There was a tense wait for the results,, but I think we already knew what they would reveal.

YES!!!! It was true, my birth mother had found me! She had looked for me, and not given up! The hole that existed on my heart was filling, I was connected. We exchanged photographs from our pasts, talked and wrote each other. I learned her story of how I came to be. It was a miracle. We both felt that way.

How could we be so lucky? The story of our relationship is for another time. This story is about transformation from connection. Being adopted I always felt lost, like I didn't belong. I lacked true connection and sought it out so many different ways. My heart ached and longed for what I thought everyone else had. What I learned after meeting my birth family was what I always I longed for. It wasn't in them I found peace after all. It was in accepting myself. Trusting myself. Loving myself.

I learned this as the years after our reunion went on. I still felt something missing. I wasn’t from a wealthy royal family. They were just people, like the rest of us. I wasn’t “ saved” by the reunion, but then again, in a way I was. It was a dream come true to know where I came from, but it didn’t complete me. What I saw in the mirror was already complete. The emptiness I felt disappeared when I choose to love myself unconditionally. When I choose to accept myself exactly as I am. I realized I had worked so hard trying to be “ something” I had missed the beauty of just BEING, and loving every breath.

What was the greatest gift you received from this experience?

Finding myself.


 

 A HUGE thank you to Susan for sharing her Soul Story! If you are interested in sharing your SOUL STORY, please reach out to: [email protected]

For more information about Her Soul Story Events, Soul Circle Membership, Retreats and Community you can visit: www.hersoulstory.com

Don't forget to subscribe to the SOUL PODCAST! You can find it here:

Tunes - https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/soul-podcast/id1454724000

Stitcher - https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/soul-podcast

Google Play - https://play.google.com/music/listen?u=0#/ps/Iu7c6pdtfkuixltusqfjvwmnnxe

Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/4Npaj9nzJGyWiI5ruzOdTE

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